Food for Thought

i've seen this question in several variations on Facebook for the past several years......and it always makes me wonder.

 i'm not sure that i am, right now, the woman my little girl self would have wanted to become.  there are aspects of who i am now, that i  would have wanted to be.....the tender hearted me, the one who feels it is better to give than to receive, the one who still is such a mama bear.....only now, it not only includes my children, but my grandchildren as well.   the one who is still a bit of a  wanderlust, hippie, who dances to my own drum...who loves a good song and beat.....and the one who, because of our grands, has grown immensely in understanding that everyone is different......and we all need and require understanding and awareness of those differences.   i am so so thankful for that part of me.....and i think that the little girl i was would love that too. i know she would love the journey i have taken as a mom with our 5 amazing daughters and the soul mate i share life with......and what those experiences have made me through all these years.

 i think there are things that have been a part of my life, at one time, and have faded into the business that we allow to take over.... things i believe the little girl i was, would appreciate the value of....and what adding them again, would bring to who i am. 

things i would like  to add more of:  more time in nature, PLAY MORE, worry less, be adventurous ,be spontaneous, listen more...talk less,  laugh and dance more, be more present, smile more, be less concerned with rules and what is "expected", fear less, breathe more, celebrate every day, slow life down, let go.

i know, that certain circumstances in my/our lives, have made me who i am....and required threads to be woven into this tapestry that might not have been my choice.....however, life happens because ""No person gets to choose what challenges they will face in life. Everyone gets to choose how they will approach those challenges."  So.....i may not be  who the child i once was would have pictured, but i think she would like the person i am.....and the person i am working on becoming.......and that works for me.

thankful for our way of life...way back then.

I had the chance, today, to watch some old "home movies" from way back when......from before our first baby was born....to several years after.  I was so happy to "feel" these moments again....the free spirit i exuded, the "hands-off' mothering i embraced once our first little joined us.....and just the adventurous spirit we lived with.......i love the photography....the barefoot, free, hippie vibe...the acceptance of life back then.....it helps me feel good about those early years as a very young mama.....just 21 .....and so lacking in experience.  life was so good. and i am so thankful for the time in which our children were born....and raised.  we adventured and lived life......and for that i am so very thankful. so good to relive moments that make us who we are today.....to relive the threads that make up our tapestry.

Celebrating Moments

Why must celebrations be relegated to only the birthdays, the weddings, the holiday, or the other red-letter events in a year when every day should have something in it worth celebrating. What makes your heart dance? What makes you catch your breath in a surprising gasp? What is there in life that delights and surprises you? Embrace it! Love it! Celebrate it! We speak of celebrating the ordinary. The commonplace. the humdrum. The moments that tumble one after another that make up hours, then days, then years; the accumulation of moments THAT IS YOUR LIFE. Shouldn't there be something in all those ordinary moments worth celebrating? This is your life I'm speaking of....all of that sacred, splendid ordinariness. Celebrate the astonishing moments that lift your heart. Uncover joy in whatever it is that beautifully colors your seemingly ordinary days. Discover what it is that sets your soul soaring. There is Holiness hidden in the humdrum. Blessings that lurk in the exalted ennui. Find it. Celebrate it. Revel in it. Hallow it. ~words by Jennifer Clawson Farnes.....read from bella GRACE magazine.

 “Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so. One day I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in the pillow, or stretch myself taut, or raise my hands to the sky and want, more than all the world, your return.” ― Mary Jean Irion

 Not any of my words.....but words that speak to my heart.....and spur me on to celebrate.....each....and.....every.....day..... the ordinary....the humdrum...those are the moments, that for the most part make up these lives of ours....this is my goal....to celebrate these days, moments, so
 i end up with a very celebrated life.

some moments from my life recently........

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how lucky am i???? wow.

sounds of silence

Simon & Garfunkle's classic "The Sounds of Silence" performed by heavy metal band "Disturbed"Goosebump stuff man...WOW!!
Posted by Mark Watson on Friday, December 18, 2015

This showed up on my fb page today.....i can't even tell you how much i loved this....how much it filled my soul. i listened to it, maybe 10 times....and wanted to listen more.....but the day demanded attention to other things. in this life, that is short, hurried, full of too much busy.....it was just a time to listen.....to feel.....and be full.

enlightenment for Nonnie

well, my 8 year old grandson, Asher, has decided it is about time that i was indoctrinated into the whole LotR movies!  i am NOT, by nature, a Trekkie nor a ringer, wraith-watcher, Tolkienite, Bagginess etc  :-)....but my grandson IS!  (only he doesn't know it!)

he suggested we watch the Star Wars trilogy a few months ago, only to start me out with the 3rd movie "because he wanted to see the two monsters in it"....then we watched the first one......little does he know how hard that is for his Nonnie to transition from the last movie to the 1st one and make sense of it!  :-)

so, i rented LotR:the Fellowship of the Rings. and we proceeded to watch it over a 3 day period.  he is a great partner for ME to watch these with because:  he likes to talk the whole time the movie is playing.....so he gives me a heads up about the "bad and scary" stuff that is going to happen and assures me that either: everyone is going to be okay....or someone is going to die!  Normally i leave the room when some scary part comes on in a movie i am watching.....but this way i was forewarned and could relax (sort of) and besides.....if i left the room, i may NEVER understand what i missed!

Asher spews out words like Nazgul, ring-wraiths, Sauron the Deceiver, Elvish, Orcs, Uruk Hai until i feel like i am listening to someone speaking a foreign language....and he has to remind me over and over of the previous words....but he is a patient teacher.

the first night, i went to bed with the name Bilbo Baggins on the tip of my tongue playing over and over in my mind and hoping sooo that i did NOT dream about the Nazgul!!!

today, we watched the last hour and 20 minutes......and i wasn't sure that my heart was going to be able to take it....but Asher continued guiding me through the parts i just could not wait to watch by explaining the outcome :-).....although i could NOT watch Boromir die by the hand of Uruk Hai....so i DID leave the room, but did watch when he died in the arms of Aragorn.....and Asher commented on the tears running down my face :-)

Asher immediately was ready to begin LotR: Two Towers....but i think my nervous system needs a break....and my mind has to categorize what i already learned....but i better not wait too long or i will forget all the lingo i know!

a question i DO have is.....do you think it would be worthwhile to go see THE HOBBIT before proceeding with the other two LotR sequels, or just continue with the Trilogy?

impromptu invite*

We are always getting ready to live but never living.  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

one of my intentions this new year is to be present....live in the now...take advantage of opportunities as they arise....so when my hubby extended an invitation for an impromptu motorcycle ride into the desert......i let go of what "needed" to be done and accepted!  so glad i did....

look at what i would have missed!

new days*

The day is December 31st and we are on our way to Oceanside, California for a week by the sea.  I'm not so much in the frame of mind for resolutions, per se, but for reflection of the past year and purpose for 2013.

I have heard a lot about choosing a WORD for yourself, for the year ahead. A word that sums up your intentions, needs, resolve, or anything else that it might bring forth.  The word that came to me wasn't through searching.....or stressing......it just popped into my head, and i said "YES" that is MY world for the year 2013.

RESILIENCE/RESILIENT   

meaning 

able to recoil or spring back into shape after bending, stretching, or being compressed.
 able to withstand or recover quickly from difficult conditions...buoyancy.

when i told bryan what i had chosen, he said that to him, it meant getting back to the original OR BETTER place with or because of the experience.

i like that.

and while i was at it....i thought well why just choose one WORD.....why not go with a whole phrase......more words.....more help! so i started thinking............... one thing i am not very good at is letting go.....of worrying about what i can't control.......there is so much worry involved in having 5 daughters, 3 sons-in-laws and 8 grandbabies......and while i wouldn't change it for the world.......if i didn't color my hair....i probably would be showing a lot of silver by now!   the phrase i chose is:

LET GO.....LET GOD

now i know there are things I CAN do ....that i am responsible for what i DO have control over.....and how i react to life and my daily intentions and work........how i treat others, what vibes i put out into this world......but my hope in 2013, is to realize and accept, that when i have done all i can.....and i have NO control.....to let go and let God.

easier said that done....but it is my intention 

along with a word and a phrase....i wrote down a few more *intentions* that i would like to work at:

*be more grateful

*get outside more....more short excursions with bryan and with the girls and grands

*more nature

*things we WANT to do.....DO them

*play more

*worry less

*be who i am

*ENJOY life

*LIVE life

*create

*be the best i can be to help others

*let go of anger

*harmony

*healing

*help the grands with hard things

*be active

*healthy eating

*adventurous

*spontaneous

*positive not negative

*create memories

*be PRESENT

*listen more...talk less

here is to new days.....and new growth